Bite-Free Bonding: Your Guide to Child and Dog Harmony

Young boy sitting with a corgi in front of a Christmas tree, gently offering the dog a treat.

Creating safe and positive interactions between kids and dogs starts with gentle and supervised bonding moments.

By Siddhika Bhat, certified dog trainer and behaviorist, founder of Wagabonding: Dog Training and Beyond

Picture this: you’ve got a kid with endless energy and a dog with boundless curiosity. Sounds like a match made in heaven, right? Or maybe it’s the beginning of a delightful (and slightly chaotic) adventure! Raising kids and dogs together is like mixing peanut butter and jelly – they’re meant to be, but only with the right blend of each other. Too much of anything and you have a sandwich no one would want to touch!

Let’s dive into the tips and tricks that will make sure every tail wag and giggle stays happy and safe. Get ready to become the ultimate referee in this fun-filled friendship!

Tips for a Safe Introduction

When introducing a dog and a baby, close supervision is key. Even the most well-behaved dogs need guidance around infants. It takes careful planning and patience to ensure a smooth and safe transition for everyone.

Allow your dog to get accustomed to your baby’s scent by letting them sniff your baby’s blanket, clothes, diapers, etc.
Increase your dog’s association with the baby’s belongings by keeping them in proximity to your dog and their possessions
Observe how your dog reacts to the new things and scents
Once your dog shows comfort and familiarity towards your baby’s belongings, wrap a doll in your baby’s towel and hold it like you would hold a baby
Let your dog sniff the doll and see how your dog reacts to it. You could also play baby crying or laughing sounds while you’re at it
It is highly recommended to tire your dog out physically and mentally before introducing them to your baby. This will help avoid overstimulation
On a leash, let your dog sniff your baby’s head while you hold your baby. Take the help of another person to handle your dog during this exercise
Depending on how comfortable your dog is around the baby, allow them to get further associated with each other
Start with short, controlled interactions and focus on building a bond over time

The Importance of Calm and Gentle Interactions

It is natural for a dog to get excited around a kid. Having someone that is closer to their size and matches their energy can be highly encouraging for both the dog and the kid. However, if not managed in time, excitement can quickly escalate to over-excitement in a matter of minutes.

Calm interactions help a dog feel secure around children, who can sometimes be unpredictable. When children approach dogs in a calm manner, dogs are less likely to feel threatened or startled, which builds trust. Likewise, a kid would be more encouraged to develop a liking for dogs if they are given a chance to observe and be a part of positive pet interactions.

Training and reinforcing calmness prevents undesirable behaviors like jumping, nipping, etc. and creates a foundation of trust between the child and dog while bringing a sense of balance to the home.

Blonde girl sitting outdoors with a husky, both enjoying the sunshine and relaxed companionship.

Teaching kids to respect a dog's space and energy helps build trust and lifelong friendships.

What Can Go Wrong?

It is crucial to manifest calm greetings and gentle interactions between your dog and your kid. But it is also important to be prepared for things that may go wrong; as they say, “being forewarned is being forearmed.” Watch out for these potential risks that may arise:

The dog’s warning signs being ignored or misinterpreted (closely observe your dog and watch out for signs of stress)
The child’s boundaries being pushed (if your child is constantly avoiding the dog, make sure to take a break or change the style of interaction)
The dog’s space being invaded (Dogs need personal space, especially when resting or eating)
Risk of negative associations (if interactions consistently leave the dog or child feeling anxious or uncomfortable, it may develop a negative association, thereby jeopardizing future interactions)
Resource guarding (sharing is a great behavior to teach a child. But a dog may not look at it the same way)
Over-protective behavior (dogs may develop a protective instinct towards children and may express it through reactive or aggressive behavior)

Signs of Stress in Your Dog

Dogs are expressive beings. They are constantly communicating with us through a series of body language cues. Closely observe your dog’s body language during interactions with your kids and watch out for these signs of stress:

Rigid or stiff or frozen posture
Avoidance behavior (turning away, running away, constantly backing up, hiding in the child’s presence)
Repeatedly yawning even though not tired or sleepy
Lip licking
Tucked in tail
Raised hackles
Pinned back or flattened ears
Excessive drooling
Repeatedly shaking off
Whining, growling and barking
Snarling
Whale eyes

Understanding these signs and responding to them favorably and in time can help create positive, safe experiences for both the dog and child, building trust and enjoyment in their relationship.

How Much Can Your Dog Tolerate?

Your dog’s tolerance to stress near a kid is broadly based on a multitude of factors:

Their temperament
Past experiences with kids/ babies
Their natural instincts (e.g. – a Border Collie with a strong instinct to herd may feel the need to constantly herd the toddler)
Prior training and socialization

Some dogs have a high tolerance whereas some dogs may reach their threshold comparatively quickly. Understand your dog’s boundaries to recognize when they are being pushed.

A dog under stress will make sure to communicate through subtle as well as clear body language signs. No dog ever wakes up on a given day and decides to be aggressive. It is only when these constant signs of stress are ignored that they climb up the ladder of aggression.

A bite is always preceded by a series of warning signs sprawled over a span of several days/ weeks or months. To prevent the bite, these signs of stress must always be respected.

For harmonious coexistence, it is better to NOT know to what extent your dog can tolerate, but to know and recognize the subtlest sign of stress and give your dog the space and distance they need.

Signs of Stress in Your Baby

Babies, like dogs, can show subtle signs of stress which may indicate that they are feeling overwhelmed or uncomfortable around your dog. Make sure to adjust your baby’s environment and soothe them as and when you notice these signs of stress to ensure a harmonious and positive coexistence:

A sudden increase in crying or fussiness around the dog
Tense or stiff body movements
Clenching of fists
Attempting to itch body parts
Turning away from the dog or avoiding eye contact
Arching of the back in an attempt to show frustration or discomfort
Increased wriggling or restlessness
There could also be signs of an allergic reaction such as changes in breathing pattern, changes in skin color, itching, rashes and so on
Reduced responsiveness
Increased sucking behavior
“Zoning out” behavior

Your baby may show one or more of the above signs to communicate their discomfort at any given point in time. Some babies may also have an altogether different response. Keenly observe your baby’s body language and responsiveness to every interaction with your dog to draw out inferences.

The Right Time and Way to Intervene

This is the trickiest part of supervising a baby-dog interaction. You want to make sure to give ample freedom to your dog and your baby to get to know each other and bond. At the same time, you want to be prepared and ready to deal with any kind of mishaps. The trick is to strike a sweet spot somewhere between being negligent and coddling. Both these extremes can have disastrous outcomes.

Your kid engaging with your dog is one of the most pure and enjoyable experiences to witness. However, a keen eye is crucial to keep it that way. An interaction between your kid and your dog can continue if you observe these positive signs:

Relaxed body language
Soft tail wags
Mild excitement
A chuckle here and there
Chasing games, as long as it doesn’t end in one of them hurting the other
Games like fetch and tug as long as it doesn’t lead to overstimulation
Being around each other but doing their own thing

On the other hand, intervening at the right moment during baby and dog interactions is key to ensuring both are safe and comfortable. Here are some signs and scenarios when it’s best to step in:

SUBTLE signs of stress being exhibited by the baby or the dog: Intervening during subtle signs of stress can prevent a situation from escalating. Have your dog on a leash during such interactions and use it to create distance between your dog and kid. Allow them a few minutes to calm down before they get back to playing with each other. For instance, a game of fetch could quickly lead to over excitement, which could physically hurt a child or scare them from engaging further.
CLEAR signs of stress being exhibited by the baby or the dog: When your dog feels the need to turn to you rather than attempt to resolve a conflict on their own, you are killing it as a pack leader! If your dog and/or your child are visibly stressed in each other’s presence, it is best to give each their personal space and allow them time to cool off. If a certain game or an activity seems to stress one or both of them, make sure to avoid it in future. A baby crawling all over a big dog is a classic example of the dog’s patience being tested. Don’t be tricked into thinking that the dog not reacting is enjoying the activity. If you observe closely, your dog is clearly begging for the baby to be taken off their back.
Signs of exhaustion: If your dog or your kid are showing signs of exhaustion mid-play, make sure to take a break. At times, they could be exhausted just interacting with each other and may enjoy some time in solitude. Giving them ample personal space allows them time to reset and helps foster a deeper relationship
Disrespectful behavior: When raising a kid and a dog together, you may come across several instances where patience will be tested and boundaries disrespected. A kid hugging the dog too tight, screaming around the dog, dog jumping and nipping at the kid are all prime examples of disrespectful behaviors. Gradually help both baby and dog understand boundaries; babies can learn to pet gently, and dogs can learn to stay calm around babies.

A young girl kneeling in a park, smiling at a golden retriever holding a sprig of flowers in its mouth.

Encouraging outdoor playtime strengthens the bond between children and their furry companions in a safe and enriching environment.

What Should Your Training Focus Be?

When raising a kid and a dog together, your training should focus on positive interactions, respecting boundaries and safety for both. Here’s a quick breakdown of what your training focus must be.

Teaching and reinforcing basic obedience training: Basic obedience cues like Sit, Down, Recall and impulse control cues like Leave it, Drop it, and Stay are essential in communicating with a dog in day to day situations. These cues help in teaching a dog what to do and what no to do in a variety of situations, the end result of which is usually a well behaved dog.

Socialization/ desensitization: Dogs can be startled by sudden movements, loud noises, or unpredictable behaviors from kids. Help desensitize your dog to these by gradually exposing them to the kinds of sounds and movements a child might make, rewarding them for staying calm.

Focus on positive interactions: Encourage positive interactions by rewarding your dog for remaining calm when the child is around. Reinforce quiet, relaxed behaviors with treats and praise. Teach your child to give treats gently and help them understand the importance of gentle touch.

Teach both of them how to respect each other’s boundaries: Kids learn by watching. Demonstrate gentle, respectful interactions with the dog and appropriate behaviors like petting gently, not bothering them while they’re eating, and giving them space when they need it. Similarly, teach your dog to not display their excitement through undesirable behaviors like jumping and nipping

Teach safe games: Avoid overly exciting games like tug-of-war when the child is nearby, as these can increase the dog’s energy levels quickly and may hurt the child. Instead, introduce games like fetch or teaching your child how to toss treats for simple training tricks like “sit” and “shake.” Go for walks together.

In the end, raising kids and dogs together is like hosting a comedy duo—full of giggles, a bit of chaos, and loads of love! With a little training, some patience, and a whole lot of treats, you’ll be set to create a friendship that is timeless. Here’s to safe, happy kid-and-dog duos and to you, the ringmaster of this adorable circus! Just remember: when in doubt, paws for a moment, grab a snack, and let the laughter lead the way!